Friday, September 12, 2008

the mystery

I often have the feeling that I am holding on by a pinkie to my marriage. Not because I am unhappy, or dissatisfied, or any other tangible thing. The feeling really isn't about my marriage, but about me.

Do we ever think about how much anyone really knows us? What fraction of our true selves do we reveal to those who are closest to us?

Isn't marriage a mysterious thing? At the same time that I feel so foreign, I feel so at home. Over the years, I've found that accepting that contrast has been the key to my own marriage.

Loving someone enough to let them be a stranger.


Jen of A2eatwrite said...

For me it's more about loving someone enough to let them be their own person. I DO absolutely feel I know D inside and out and I feel he knows me in the same way, but we (mostly) celebrate our differences and allow each person to stand on his/her own feet outside of our relationship to each other. Does that make sense?

Greg said...

There is, sometimes, that question, "Who are you, really?" that touches on the mystery of marriage--that as well as one knows one's spouse there remains large swathes of unknown...and that is the beauty therein.

cathouse teri said...

I love this post.

anno said...

This post has haunted me. I keep returning to it, reconsidering your words, looking at the images you chose. I married someone who is so different from me that I suspect we are largely unknowable to each other. That anything works is a mystery. That it works well is a miracle.

Beautiful post!